Aries: A pair of reverse-bladed katana, the otherworldly metal glows green in the candlelight.
Taurus: A ceremonial knife made from the jawbone of a she-wolf. Must save some for mother. Always save some for mother.
Gemini: A decorative kite shield worked into the wearers armor. The apex of the shield comes to a trio of deadly, blunted edges resembling a lions claw.
Cancer: A long whip of braided metal terminating in a wickedly frayed tip. The only thing worse than a sinner is a traitor.
Leo: A harpoon made from jet black metal. Its user unmoving, poised to hurl the spear at some long vanished foe.
Virgo: An ornate rapier, the hilt conceals an ingenious mechanism and a length of spring-loaded silver wire.
Libra: Long metal hammers tipped with a spearhead. Can be braced at the shoulder as a lance, or wheeled above the head to strike with even greater force.
Scorpio: A weapon that resembles a pickaxe haphazardly plated with silver, because that’s exactly what it is. The tool of an illegal and frankly unsavory profession.
Ophiuchus: A heavy, but unassuming sword. An expert would know that it has been forged to kill something very, very specific.
Sagittarius: A gun.
Capricorn: A pair of blocky metal hammers embossed with heavy, checkered faces. Weapons made for bashing armor and bone out of shape. Weapons wielded by someone who really hates shields.
Aquarius: A weapon born of hubris. Far too large for any one man to carry. Countless weapons, pieces of armor, entire corpses smelted together into a hellish greatsword.
Pisces: Simple hooked daggers that double as climbing bracers. Walls mean nothing to those who can scale them.
Oh sorry? you think someone wanted to go up and measure that thing with a fucking yardstick??? just roll on up to the boar the size of a fucking car with some handily-dandily measuring tape? to get an accurate reading on it in fucking centimeters???
Definitely don’t get your books from non university sources guys!! If they can’t gouge you on your book fees as well as your hyper-inflated tuition then how is that sportsball team gonna get another huge new stadium they definitely don’t need!!
